Fear Not

I feel I have been neglectful in my duties as a whining bitchy asshole. At least online anyway.

So. News. Well I lost the cumstain as he is more fondly known as. Got jack of all the I’m an emotional retard but you should still take it in the date bullshit and went holaaaa I am out of here.

Though it has not been smooth sailing and there has been constant back and forth of why are we doing this? Why do you suck? Why are you psycho? Why do you have the social capacity of a twelve year old? Etc etc.

Amy however is still riding that train. God knows why. To be honest I am a little bit pissed at her lately. I seem to be the guy that carries my friends through their breakups. I am all about planning fun adventures and keeping them occupied. Yet here I am in week one post break up and who of my friends have I seen? None. Fuck Amy can’t even peel herself off her boyfriend to even call me back. Thanks love!

In other news I am pretty much headed for intervention re: drinking habits. It seems bad timing that it’s my good friend’s big birthday bash tonight though. Half my friends are urging me to quit the others are bringing extra wine in the hopes they can twist my arm. Which of course will be a breeze? But I will hold out as long as I can.


Ohhhh. Actually I do have some good things to talk about. I made a new friend. Well I have known her a while but being the awkward rude idiot I am have never really spoken to her until now. We realised we have a lot in common. Like a love of teenage boys and their pretty nubile faces. Le swoon. I teach cougar 101. 18 year olds are so much more fun to corrupt.

Anyway I have to roll out of bed before I wet myself and probably shower and think about facing the world today. Awesome.